There was a lot of talk throughout the week of Newcastle undoing all of the hard work against Chelsea and Spurs by getting turned over by Norwich. Although there wasn’t any real danger of that happening, but we didn’t half make life difficult for ourselves.
We were cruising, until a series of corners gave a, quite frankly, dreadful Norwich side some hope. There was one moment at the very end where 50,000 people yelped as it looked like Norwich had equalised. As it happens, he was offside anyway. And he put it wide…
Loic Remy once again showed his importance to the side with another goal FROM A CORNER!! He scored from a corner. What made it even sweeter was my mate Busta who has been counting the corners since that Wolves away game missed the goal. Chortle.
Gouffran put in another superb shift – and it seems that Ed’s declaration that he is rubbish has sparked a commentators curse, as he has been terrific ever since.
The win saw us open quite a gap on bottom half of the table, and puts us two points of third which is mental. Another win next week against a tougher opposition than Norwich would really set us up for the rest of the season. Dare we dream?
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This game was always a slightly worrying prospect; United have a tendency to struggle against the weaker side of the premier league, especially after back to back victories against the media’s favourite London clubs. The first couple of minutes dispelled this bad ju-ju as we carved into them like a black and white scalpel through some slightly rancid butter. More curses abated as Remy headed in from a corner on two minutes. (The last time we scored from a corner in a premier league game was over two years ago, I know this because my wife was in labour at the time and subsequently not particularly interested in my muted celebrations)
The first half was one of wasted opportunities; we could have easily been a few goals up and eventually our second goal was orchestrated from an inspired and talismanic performance from Shola Ameobi up front, giving my current favourite player (sorry Michael) Gouffran, a simple tap in. Yanga-Mbiwa filled the Debuchy shaped hole at full back with aplomb, Williamson was solid yet again (why a nobody like Chris Smalling is ahead of him in the England squad says it all about the state of the national side) and Coloccini was his usual magnificent self despite his apparent yearnings for Argentina.
Half time came too early, United were in full control but, to conform to type, it all changed at half time.
Norwich were easily one of the poorest sides I have ever seen at SJP this season and incidentally should have had two straight red cards but for a decrepit refereeing performance from Mike Dean. However, we decided to sit back and soak up pressure, allowing one of the lowest scoring sides in the league to get a goal back and a sniff at a chance to equalise. Subsequently, the last ten minutes played out like classic Newcastle United; hearts in mouths and sighs of relief at the final whistle. As many of us do, I feel for Chris Houghton, but we need to be putting teams like Norwich to the sword.
There is a burning question that I just dont know the answer to…maybe the knowledgeable readers of this fair publication can answer it. Why can we only ever play for 45 minutes?
Being excited about a game usually means we are going to get humped, being miserable about a game usually means we are going to win. I was excited but thought yesterday had Hull written all over it after 45 minutes.
Two goals up by half time we could…and should…have pressed on against a pretty awful Norwich side. Redmond looked like he had a pair of slippers on the number of times he fell over and if John Ruddy is the future of English goalkeeping we are ruddy fooked! (im here all night!).
Does Pardew actually tell the players to come out and do jack shit in the second half? I can just imagine him wandering around the dressing room patting Sissoko on the head and saying ‘wew dan san’ eating a chocolate Tracker bar. Perhaps Im being too harsh but should have racked up a cricket score.
Shola looked like he actually realised he can play football after his screamer against Italy and was full of lovely touches with a slide rule pass for the second goal. Remy was class as ever and we actually scored from a corner…deary me! It didnt even get punted to big Mike either! Class.
Some baffling substitutions followed and it would have made more sense to take Sissoko off instead of the brilliant brilliant Goufran but we won so what do I know? I say it every week but I absolutely love Goufran, I tried to name my new cat after him but our lass wouldnt let me. She still gets called Goufazzzzz out of ear shot…the cat that is. He is a class act and pure grafter.
So all in all another good day and I learned two valuable lessons…..One: he’s going to Brazil, because he’s fucking brill! Two: Tiote should not keep shooting.