MATCH REPORT: Sunderland 3 Newcastle United 0, Stadium of Light, 25/Oct/15, KO: 12noon, Premier League. Att: 47,653

by • October 25, 2015 • Match reportsComments (20)4234

Bill Murray has made some great films – Ghostbusters, Caddy Shack, Royal Tenenbaums – absolutely mint.  His one box office hit I’ve never been able to abide features him waking up on the same day in perpetuity – Sunderland are fucking dreadful, they’re there for the taking, we contrive to fluff our lines and the whole sorry episode is a cycle of unmitigated misery and frustration – heard it before?  This years chapter saw us absolutely dominate the first forty odd minutes before somehow contriving to end up well beaten in yet another hideous derby.

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Even the most blinkered Mackem would acknowledge that we dominated the game in the first half but (and it is a big but

SUNDERLAND, ENGLAND - OCTOBER 25 : Fabricio Coloccini of Newcastle is sent off by referee Mr R Maley for a foul on Steven Fletcher of Sunderland during the Barclays Premier League match between Sunderland AFC and Newcastle United FC at the Stadium of Light on October 25, 2015 in Sunderland, United Kingdom. (Photo by Mark Runnacles/Getty Images)

and I cannot lie) we couldn’t create a real chance of note and failed to take advantage of our superiority.  I’d even go as far as saying that their side and fans were resigned to the inevitable from very early on as we bossed possession and took the game to them from the off.  The referee, Richard Madeley of shoplifting and book club fame showed leniency early on, seeking to speak to players rather than brandish a card but Tiote went into the book after following up one yellow card worthy challenge with one in front of the ref thirty seconds later but the tone had been set in the game where stonewall bookings were met with a talking to rather than a card.

Sunderland were reduced to aimless lumps upfield whilst we had good opportunites from Coloccini and most notably Colback who should have done far better than tap a great chipped ball over straight at Lurch Panitllimon.  Sissoko was dominant in the middle and the first turning point of the game came when Toivonen limped off to be replaced by Defoe.  I wouldn’t be exaggerating to say that if someone had told me that the Swede had won a competition from the crowd to play in a Premiership game for the day, then I’d have wondered what the entry criteria were.  He was that poor.  From having a lone striker and singularly failing to close us down, the Mackems all of a sudden had some shape but were still second best when the pivotal moment of the game came seconds before the break.

They broke quickly and the ball was played through.  Eliott seemed to stop his run off the line allowing Fletcher a chanceCP Company Quilted Soft Shell Hooded Jacket - Black of nicking it.  He was eased off the ball by Coloccini but the referee deemed it both a foul and a goalscoring opportunity, both of which were at best dubious and sent our captain off whilst awarding a spot kick.  Adam Johnson put it in the bottom corner and saw fit to run the length of the pitch to goad our support who had barracked him all game.  Still, you never know when you’ll next get the chance to run 100 metres in a straight line eh Adam?

Even down to ten men, we started the second half on top and had a gilt edged chance to level.  Mitrovic had miles of space in the box and cut inside his man leaving him with the whole goal to aim at but he fired meekly at Pantillimon and we wilted as our best chance went begging.  Before that Colback had limped off after a challenge with Cattermole with the home fans able to get onto the cinder track again to berate the midfielder as he made his way from the pitch.  Cattermole got away with murder with the ref comically pointing out four fouls he had committed before drawing the card and while we were still in it at 1-0, any hopes we had were extinguished when they doubled their lead when Billy Jones got on the end of a flick on in front of Eliott sparking their fans into proper life for the first time.

We still had a couple of efforts and threw the laughably bad Thauvin into the fray but they put the icing on their shitty, HUGO BOSS Green Jurado Jacket - Navy (1)extra value cake with a third and to be fair it was a canny goal if you ignore Thauvin’s cowardly pulling out of a tackle at the start of the move which led to Fletcher finishing the game and us off.  I had a wander down to the concourse at this point, there’s only so many seasons you can bear them celebrating in front of your eyes and I felt strangely indifferent.  I was raging last year after getting beat here but I just felt flat today – aye we should have buried them in the first half but aye, we didn’t and I’m not really that arsed about hard luck stories – six in a row against these is fucking unforgivable and we’re second bottom with one win after ten games.  It’s all well and good showing promise but if it doesn’t turn into results sharpish then we’re knackered.  God only knows which league this game might be in the next time we meet at their place but for now we have to bend over and take it again from them.  Grim.

Keep the Faith

Newcastle United – Eliott 5, Janmaat 5, Coloccini 3, Mbemba 6, Dummett 4 (Thauvin 1), Sissoko 7, Colback 5 (Anita 5), Tiote 3 (Lascelles 6), WIJNALDUM 8, Perez 6, Mitrovic 5

Ref – Madley – 2 – Wasn’t up to a game like this

Our Fans – 6 – Noisy in the first half, slipped into familiar numbness in the second

Their Fans – 6 – Very noisy after the goals but you got the sense that even they knew they’d dodged a bullet

GARETH HARRISON – Follow gareth on @truefaith1892 


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20 Responses to MATCH REPORT: Sunderland 3 Newcastle United 0, Stadium of Light, 25/Oct/15, KO: 12noon, Premier League. Att: 47,653

  1. tom Bates says:

    We miss the strong characters who used to raise their game for the derbies and understood it’s importance. The likes of Carroll Nolan Barton always performed in those games but we decided to ship out those player’s and replace them with players who probably don’t see the Derby as the huge game the fans do

  2. Pat Hughes says:

    Can’t really comment as I’ve seen nothing of the game yet but the commentary on Radio Newcastle didn’t seem to match the comments on Twitter and the pundits were beside themselves with joy when the penalty was given. That was enough and I had to switch off. Gutted as I really thought we could shake off the hoodoo this time. I await the match report which will undoubtedly tell me the real facts.

  3. Anton says:

    I know we’re hurting, but let’s not go nuts.
    Longing for Barton must be a sign of post traumatic stress disorder. Also, since Nolan was fired by WH, they seem to be doing not too bad.

    The simple truth is we’ve been short of two central defenders for 3 plus years; Tiote has been in terminal decline for 2 plus years; and we’re only one goalkeeper injury away from a crisis. We’ve had plenty of warning on every front.

    Yes the referee was a clown, but we should be destroying teams like Sunderland and West Brom with 9 players. McClaren is correct about one thing: we’ll need at least 3 transfer windows’ worth of business to re-build NUFC as a team.

  4. tom Bates says:

    I wasn’t Barton or Nolans biggest fan either but certainly Nolan made a huge contribution to our derby wins. Some average dirty players are sometimes whats needed in a derby. The team had no luck at all today but the amount of goals we are shipping is worrying. Any more injuries or suspensions at the back will leave us incredibly vulnerable.

  5. Bob says:

    It will be interesting to see if we appeal against the red card and what the outcome is. I certainly think they should. For that tussle to be given a penalty and red card is incredible bearing in mind the holding, shirt pulling etc.that goes on in the box yet a shoulder charge is penalised. Later a Sunderland plater did similar in their box and nothing, despite being shoulder to back. The ref allowed several Sunderland fouls before booking Tiote for his first, just like last week it appears the ref has his name already in his book. No cards at all for Sunderland is baffling and again it will be interesting to see if the ref is sanctioned. I thought it was the best we’ve played in a Derby for years.

    • gavnufc says:

      We had to score when on top, had that feeling it would return to bite us on the arse. Doubt a team has ever played so badly and won 3-0 but again, will go down in history as a battering. 6 defeats in a row and not one against a team of any quality or substance. Harsh on colo but clumsy, easy home call for the ref, red ended the contest to be fair. Everything went against NUFC, Bet SAFC fans couldn’t believe what they witnessed. Truly depressing day. As a 30 year old mag through total local dominance through my years it’s totally bewildering and completely embarrassing to lose to such dross time after time , my club never fails to let me down in the time of need. Why I bring myself to care is almost as self depreciating as following this absolute mess but I can’t shake it, cheers dad..

  6. Steve says:

    A personal highlight for me was the referee pointing out Cattermoles 4 fouls followed by a no more. Truly astonishing. You know what, we turned up today and as shit as it is, take it on the chin. Never known such a subdued home crowd till the goal, and Colo takes some criticism at time and rightly so but what a shocking decision. We are 5 times the team they are and only the most blinded Mackem wouldn’t see that today. They are welcome to Allardyce, they got a taste of him today. Can’t wait for them to come here, really I can’t.

  7. Andy bee says:

    Agreed steve they’re fkin awful! Get them here later in season and nail their fkin coffin the bastads are doomed this season. Best I’ve seen for a long time from us in Derby but felt occasion passed the genie by , sissoko I’ll eat humble pie you were much better big man keep it up fella. An eventful day with sh&t refs and flying metro windows but hey ho we will prevail …….

  8. Paul says:

    You forgot to mention the fact we should of been awarded a penalty seconds before they broke and got theirs, game changing decision and the pivotal moment in a match we dominated and would of won otherwise! Definitely not a sending off either!

  9. MooMoo says:

    Meh, I’ll take that as one of them games. Better team lost, which is a million times more palatable than watching the piss-weak, shit-scared headless chickens we’ve sent out under AP and JC recently. Just frustrating it comes on the back of the previous five. Can’t say I’m particularly angry at the players or management though.

    Had to laugh at Fat Shame saying “We’ve all done a job today, the players themselves and me for the way I set them out tactically”. Cos conceding 71% possession and 0 shots on target until a red card came along was his plan all the time.

  10. rich says:

    Putting on my impartial hat, i just can’t see how it was a penalty. I thought Collo was simply stronger. He didn’t lean with his arm so was a fair challenge.

    Looking at the bigger picture and based upon the performance of both teams i think it is SAFC who should be more worried. The dark forces at work only come out when they play us. I wonder of the Chronic can get hold of Uri Geller and put the curse to bed……

    • Richard Jones says:

      Totally agree with regard to SAFC. They are very poor. I saw M’Vila described as a ‘rock in midfield’ on one of the SAFC websites though he looked unfit and slow though admittedly can pass the ball. I think Borini will have to play out of his skin for the rest of the season (when he gets back) for SAFC to have any sort of chance. Currently it looks like 3 from the bottom 5 but still early days – we’ll see who buys who in January.
      Don’t know why Newcastle are down there – too much quality not to stay up. I am trying to be diplomatic here and not point a finger at the manager. With every passing week Pardew grows more and more in my estimation.
      With regard to the foul/penalty. The referee was giving free kicks for every innocuous challenge in the first half (though seemingly not handballs) so it wasn’t a surprise and unfortunately referees aren’t allowed to use common sense anymore with regard to the sending off. If he didnt send him off then the ref gets marked down for his performance.
      I know she usually gets a lot of stick from Newcastle supporters but a nice match report by Louise Taylor in the Guardian which is highly critical of the referee.

  11. Lofty says:

    I noticed Melon heed saying he’d pulled off some tactical black magic as well! F*ck me he’s deluded…I also mentioned Sunderland being in bigger trouble than us based on the performance and was told by my Mackem friends it was sour grapes. F*ck me they’re all deluded!

    • Richard Jones says:

      Yep your mackem friends are deluded. Everyone (i.e. every Mackem) i talked to after the game seemed to take delight in the fact that Sunderland are/were a total shambles and yet somehow won 3-0. Me and my brother were even joking during that first half that Sunderland were not bothering to mark Sissoko (the best player on the pitch) perhaps believing that if they ignored him then he didnt actually exist. If Newcastle had come out in the second half with the same intensity as the first then i believe they could have won. They still looked dangerous every time they had a go.
      It’s just a freak result really – I cant remember Sunderland having more than 4 shots in total (Cattermole had a shot blocked out side the area in the first half) and Newcastle seemed to lack the belief that they could win even though they had the better players. Jack Colback going off injured was probably the key in this respect.

  12. Stephen says:

    IF BUT MAYBE !, it was 3-0 to them and they are pissing themselves laughing at us again.

    That spell from 1980 to 2008 when we owned them (barring the play off home game and two 2-1 flukes at SJP) on and off the pitch and especially down there is now a distant memory. That place is bang up for taking no shit of us outside. And inside they take it to the limit,they fucking hate us and they are prepared to terrorize anything Newcastle United in that stadium even if it means going on the pitch to do it. I wish SJP was like that on Derby day. The dynamic of the two fan bases has switched.

    Lee Cattermole, i watched his ‘actions’ with McClean at West Brom last week and wished we had a c*** like him and so it proved again. Fletcher, O’Shea (even though he went off) and Cattermole. Not by any means brilliant players but players with a bit of spine about them, British players who know the mentality needed to win a Derby even if it’s not ‘their’ Derby (Scottish one, Manc one etc). It is no coincidence that since we lost our British spine we have been embarrassing. We have no leaders, no spine better footballers aye but in that bear pit we need more than that.

    Ahh never mind though we’ll be cheering to the rafters when we fluke our one big scalp at SJP this season, Man U, Liverpool or City meanwhile Sunderland continue to piss themselves laughing at what we have become.

  13. Stephen B says:

    Glad somebody else noticed Colback had 2 decent chances to score but was pathetically weak with his efforts because he didn’t want to use his weaker foot, Jesus, how much does he get paid per week & can’t even use both feet, criminal.

  14. Bob says:

    So, the FA overturn Colo’s red. Ah, so that’s alright then. Now they charge some of our players for complaining about the decision which they agree was wrong. Only at the FA! They are about as inconsistent as their referees.