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VOLUME 71: Not so shiny, happy people

Coverage for the dates 24th August - 3rd September 2006

Unlike those on high within the halls of NE1 let’s cut the crap and just get on with it eh?  The main focus of the last week and a bit has been the closure of the transfer window and how Newcastle United have found yet more interesting ways to publicly humiliate themselves during that time.  It’s not as if we’ve had a whole load of problems hoisted on us at the last moment is it?  We’ve known what was needed all summer, we’ve had plenty time to prepare.  The phrase “fail to prepare, prepare to fail” has been played repetitively on a loop within the vaults of the tf bunker all summer. I even made a list before doing the shopping the other day.  Wor lass was happy so at least some good has come out of it.  But I digress.

 

The warning signs, as if we needed any, we evident from the two games played in this time.  A toothless display against Ventspils where 70% of the possession was turned into precisely bog all up front (Article) (Article) (Article) (Article) (Article) and a better team would have made more of our weaknesses at the back.  Which Aston Villa duly did the following Sunday (Article) where the real villains were indeed the team in Black & White (Article).  Soft goals (Article) and a no show from too many individuals (Article) that we’ve seen far too many times from the same culprits over the last 2 or 3 seasons.  Add to that the injury scare given to us by Obafemi Martins (Article) and the lingering doubts over Shola’s hip (Article), yet another problem we could and should have addressed over the summer, our squad looked woefully thin in some areas and vastly oversubscribed in others.  Not something new to us though is it?

 

To add to our troubles we are also the main players in an ongoing VAT tribunal, the outcome of which could cost us a lot of money and will ultimately have ramifications across the whole English game.  (Article)  Just how much have we paid to agents over the last few years?  One or two seem to be doing very well out of us indeed.  They’ll be disappointed now the window is closed and business is done.  Well most of them will…

 

Worry not comes the cry from our illustrious leaders.  We’re in “pole position” to sign three players (Article).  A centre back and a centre forward (Article).  Had on that’s 2 isn’t it?  Not 3 and certainly not the 6 players Roeder said we needed at the end of last season.  By the next day that had become 2 strikers (Article) and a day later one striker (Article=), on loan (Article).  In fact that was the only promise really delivered as we announced the surprise loan signing of Rossi from Man U (Article).  It would seem our former Academy boss prefers to blood other team’s youngsters at the cost of our own.  Or am I being too harsh?

 

With time ticking just who was coming in then?  Woodgate back from Real Madrid? (Article) (Article) (Article)  Nope, back to join The Beasts though I’ll not knock the lad for wanting to join his hometown club.  It would appear our chairman and manager could not agree on his high wage/injury risk combination and as a result he felt “more wanted” by The Beasts.  Must be the long hair I reckon.

 

So what about another centre back linked with The Beasts, Robert Huth? (Article) A last minute hijack attempt failed apparently (Article).  With the player again insisting he didn’t want to go anywhere other than The Smogside (Article).  Pathetic really, and again contradicting statements over the last 3 months from both chairman and manager perhaps explains why this was doomed to failure.

 

Ok then, Graveson surely.  (Article)  Signed for the green half of Glasgow (Article) (Article) and Champions’ League football.  Again don’t blame the lad I mean given the choice I’d think twice at the moment if we seemed anything less than 100% committed to bringing him in.

 

Mido was next up (Article).  Signed for Spurs (Article) though I do wonder were we ever really in the running?

 

The final insult is this bizarre obsession we seem to have with a fat Australian. (Article)  Which along with our late thrashings of desperation to get Huth has succeeded in upsetting The Beasts big time (Article).  Not that that is necessarily a bad thing like, it just makes them feel important to us which is 2nd only to their close relations in their funny little hearts.

 

And they’re not the only ones pissed off at us.  How about James Milner? (Article) How must he feel and how can he really feel like giving 100% to us when it’s plain to all concerned he is deemed surplus to requirements when a deal with Villa was all but done only to be recalled when our own failings to secure what we needed elsewhere became apparent.  No wonder Martin O’Neill is upset (Article) (Article).  I don’t blame him.  The only thing we can do is back the lad every time he crosses the line in the shirt because we know in his heart of hearts he must be thing “why the fuck am I bothering?”  It’s up to us now because the management have done the lad up like a kipper.

 

And as for the remainder of our business as the window closed?  I’m guessing the only person genuinely happy is football agent Willie McKay, having negotiated Boumsong and Faye out of the club and then got Man City Reserve Antoine Sibierski (Article) into St James’ (and don’t even try to tell us he was one of the one’s we were in “poll position” for a little over a week ago Glenn) into SJP along with the returning Olivier Bernard (Article).  Nice business if you can get it.

 

Olivier Bernard has a lot to prove for my money.  You’ll remember we had to drag him back to the club twice before he left convinced he was off to Juve (I wonder who by?) having turned down a contract that would have allegedly made him the third best paid left back in the Premiership at that time.  Big mistake? (Article)  Too right and we’ll do well to remember he’s shat on Leeds to come here (Article).  A desperation signing in my opinion and no olive branch to me (Article).  I’d rather have Craig Bellamy back.

 

So as our chairman starts blaming the system (Article) and whinging about the window (Article) and finding yet more ways to insult our intelligence (Article) where exactly are we at now?  Hoping for as few injuries as possible? (Article)  Oh yes!  A summer of discontent? (Article)  Undoubtedly.  Too little too late? (Article)  Definitely.  Ending on a flat note? (Article) Absolutely.  This could be a long old season ahead.


NM

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