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Well you
haven’t got rid of me that easily. There may not have been much
issuing forth from this corner of the tf bunker of late (families
eh? You can’t pick ‘em…) but rest assured I have been watching and
casting an ever weathered eye over the media out put of the World
Cup.
 So
we’re in the quarter-finals, Owen is fecked for the rest of the year
at least and you can almost guarantee NUFC is going to sign someone
who is shite on the back of the World Cup (why should this time
round be any different? Don’t like the look of that Kuyt mesel’ from
what I have seen. Bloody big hooter he has an’arrl. Looks like
summat off of Sesame Street). As far as the written press goes it’s
been what we expected. The tabloids sticking to the tried and
trusted “get your England flag/hat/barbecue set here/two world wars
and one world cup/build them up to knock them down” formula that
guarantees sales and a degree of unhealthy tension every time, the
broadsheets playing a more cerebral game, sagely discussing the pros
and cons of various systems, team selections and training programmes
to cope with “the heat” as if it’s something no-one has ever had to
contend with in a World Cup before. It’s all very predictable and
there’s been very little that is particularly new or inspiring for
me. They’re all doing pod casts and suchlike and trying to be “down”
with the new media hungry generation and frankly failing miserably
if you ask me. They could try just sticking to writing copy worth
printing. You never know it may catch on.
The coverage of Michael Owen from his inclusion in the squad to his
bizarre injury that has put a damper on our season before it starts
has been curious. After months of whinging and whining and veiled
digs at NUFC’s medical staff whilst worrying if “England’s Michael
Owen” would be fit for the tournament, they were quick to round on
him the minute he wasn’t banging them in for the national side.
Shades of how they turned on Shearer for me, and remember how all of
a sudden they wanted him back when it suited. Now he’s fecked again
and it’s “Newcastle United’s Michael Owen” and they really couldn’t
give a toss. I’ve even heard some so called experts saying Owen’s
finished and won’t kick a ball again. Cheery folk, they make me look
like I have eaten a week’s supply of Prozac in one go. No doubt
they’ll be picking off the easy target that is FFS as he starts to
fight for compensation in his own inimitable and ever subtle style
somewhere along the way. Compensation? Don’t hold your breath like.
The local press have tried to make a fist of it and at least it’s
given them something else to talk about other than randomly naming
half the players at the tournament as the latest “transfer link
exclusive.” The Journal has sent everyone’s favourite cub reporter
Luke Edwards across to cover the tournament. No wonder he was so
keen to get his little mate Kieron on the plane to Germany with
Sven. If you get a chance to have a peek at his blog, including his
incisive summary of the significance of Nuremberg in the aftermath
of WWII juxtaposed with the irony of England playing there with a
Japanese referee, I’d heartily recommend it. No seriously I would.
Stick to the football lad eh? I know it’s hard when you can’t use
the words “Dyer”, “agony” and “Comeback trail” but have a go man.
The radio coverage finds similar comparisons to that of the written
press. The introduction of TalkSport as an official broadcaster for
the tournament has meant for the first time the BBC have had serious
competition for the airwaves. With use of simultaneous broadcasts on
MW and DAB both the BBC via 5Live and TalkSport have brought
coverage of every single game. Though quite how many listeners took
in Togo vs. Switzerland “live and exclusive” on DAB I have no idea.
On a personal note I wouldn’t be without this DAB malarkey and if
anyone knows if getting one for the car is a good idea or not I’d
appreciate your comments. Going back to the radio coverage it’s
boiled down to the BBC trying to be all big and clever like the
broadsheets with TalkSport, a station I just can’t help but listen
to even though it repeatedly boils my piss (Ed: John fucking Gaunt?
Are you taking the piss?), taking on the role of the tabloids. For
me the BBC just have not been clever enough to justify the licence
fee and TalkSport all too lairy but I would like to know what they
feed their commentary teams before they do a match because I’d a
like of it mesel’.
And so we come to the TV coverage of it all, the medium all of us
will have followed most of the tournament through. Sky Sports bless
them get all a bit left out and you can’t help but detect more than
a little green eye through the smiles on the Sky Sports News desk.
The BBC and ITV are head to head on this one with the curious
addition of UKTV doing the same games as BBC but in a bit more of a
Channel 5 style with a hint of Soccer AM. In fact that’s probably a
bit unfair on Channel 5 when I think about it. Pack it in UKTV,
you’re not big, you’re not clever, you’re not funny. Stick to
repeats of Top Gear and They Think It’s All Over thanks.
For me the BBC has won this one hands down. Ok they aren’t without
their faults; Hansen (please say something new), Lawrensen (can’t
pronounce moment correctly), Wright (sit still man!), Jonathon
Pierce (stop pronouncing the foreign names in a stupid accent) and
Graham Taylor spring instantly to mind. On the whole though they are
more polished and are trying to be a little different to what you
might expect from the BBC and it’s working. Lineaker has stopped
trying to be a stand up comedian, Shearer is the pick of every panel
everywhere (ok we’re biased in the tf bunker but you’ll allow us
that I’m sure), Martin O’Neill is entertainingly odd and Gordon
Strachan and Adrian Chiles are developing into some sort of modern
day Saint and Greavsie double act. I don’t know why but I kind of
like it. Perhaps it’s my age or summat.
ITV meanwhile really need some new ideas and to find some new faces
from the same old ones they trot out every time. Gabby Logan or
Steve Ryder fronting the show? I know which I prefer but they really
should know by now. Venables, Southgate, McCoist, Townsend and Earle
could ensure a good night’s sleep for the Insomniac’s society of
Great Britain. Sam Allardyce comes across as a bitter spiv and David
Pleat really does talk a right load for someone who is an alleged
football genius and I’d recommend Paolo DiCanio’s
autobiography for further opinion on the man. The highlight of ITV’s
coverage for me so far was
 watching
Stuart Pearce and Ruud Gullit sat together just hoping it would kick
off. I wonder whose great idea that was for a pairing?
Right that would be me for now, Gabby’s on the telly and I’ve got
some stickers to put in my Panini album. If you know anyone who
wants a Kaka for a Quim tell them I’ve got plenty swaps.
NM |
On
Level 7